Share the Love
- Brielle Wolfe
- Aug 24, 2021
- 5 min read
Updated: Dec 4, 2021
What is love?
I've caught myself thinking about this lately, wondering what it truly means? In a world that defines love as so many different things and in so many different ways, it's hard to decipher which is real love and which is not, especially with the media throwing its various versions of romance in our faces. Not to say that I don't enjoy them, I do. However, the problem lies within some people tending to expect the real thing to be exactly like what we see and read, but the only thing is, that's not reality. Reality is much more messier and unpredictable. And I'm not saying having expectations is bad because they're not. But the goal is to have realistic expectations that are healthy and beneficial to your relationships, not toxic, unrealistic expectations that usually lead relationships to disaster.
But that's not all. . .
I've come to realize that people, in general, are just plain selfish, and most take others who have nothing but good intentions for granted.
Philippians2:3
"Don't be selfish; don't try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves."
And we can't forget the flip-floppers, that one minute feels they're in love with you and on top of the world but the next, as soon as something goes wrong, their feelings change and are no longer in that bubble of euphoria. So then they create all these excuses of why the two of you can't be together anymore and why it won't work out, putting most of the blame on you. Or the "I think we should breakup because I don't have that feeling of love towards you."
Let me make this as clear as I possibly can. . .
STOP MAKING LOVE INTO A FEELING! THAT IS NOT WHAT LOVE IS!
So then, what is love?
1Corinthians13:4-7
"Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance."
To love is an action. Yes, you more than likely will feel some type of way towards a person you have a romantic interest in, and same goes for both family members and friends. Said feelings would feel like: you enjoy their company and want to be around them more, you care for them and what goes on in their lives, you feel good and happy around them, you miss and think of them in times of both busyness and while alone, you want intimacy and a connection with them, you make them into a priority because they're important to you, etc.
But what happens when one day those feelings change, regardless of whether it's your romantic partner, family member, or friend? No matter who they are, that person is close to you. And you don't know if or when those feelings will come back. What happens when there's days you just flat-out dislike them and don't want anything to do with that person? Or when you discover a few new qualities about that person that just seem to grind your gears, annoying you to no end? What then? You just give up and drop them like they never meant a thing to you? You become practically strangers? I pray that your answer is no because that's not the right thing to do.
Feelings are inconsistent. They're always changing based on several different internal and external factors. Therefore, love is not merely a feeling. Did you hear that? No? I'll say it again.
LOVE IS NOT MERELY A FEELING!
Rather, it's a choice based in commitment and respect. You have to choose to keep loving your husband/wife, boyfriend/girlfriend, family member, friend, etc., even when it becomes difficult at times.
1Peter4:8
"Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins."
Ephesians4:2
"Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other's faults because of your love."
We are literally commanded to love. Not feel love, but COMMANDED to love.
2John1:6
"Love means doing what God has commanded us, and He has commanded us to love one another, just as you heard from the beginning."
John15:17
"This is my command: Love each other."
I implore you to love each other honestly and earnestly, even when you dislike them the most. Though, I'm not saying loving someone is easy because it's not. But that's where forgiveness and acceptance come in. Both are key in any relationship. It's what will allow your love to shine in the darkest of moments of your relationships.
Colossians3:13
"Make allowances for each other's faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others."
So, for the last time, I ask you: what is love?
Love is wanting each other to succeed.
Love is wishing each other happiness.
Love is not to be based on emotions, but meant to be a decision.
Love is believing and finding the best in others.
Love is not meant to be fleeting like our emotions, but meant to be steady, grounded in commitment and respect as a choice.
Love is baring, accepting, and forgiving all things.
Love is selfless.
Love is and requires self-sacrifice.
Love is quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger.
Love is serving the other by being a giver.
Love is being an encourager, comforter, and protector.
Love is both showing and verbalizing.
Love is understanding.
Love is giving of time, attention, affection, and respect.
God is love!
1Corinthians13:13
"Three things will last forever - faith, hope, and love - and the greatest of these is love."
1Corinthians16:14
"And do everything with love."
Ephesians5:22-23, 25-26, & 33
"For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. . . For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ Jesus loved the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God's word. . . So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband."
John13:34
"So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other."
1John4:8
"But anyone who does not love does not know God, for God is love."
1John4:16
"We know how much God loves us, and we have put our trust in his love. God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God lives in them."
Matthew22:37-40
"Jesus replied, "You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind." This is the first and greatest commandment. A second is equally important: "Love your neighbor as yourself." The entire law and all the demands of the prophets are based on these two commandments."
P.S.-
For those of you who have or are dating those with depression and/or anxiety, just keep in mind, we love more deeply than most. Unfortunately, not many people will understand this; hence why so many shy away from those who love this way because it's not something they're used to. But why do we love like this then? Well, it's because we know the pain of battling one's own thoughts and feelings of not being good enough, unwanted, burdensome, worthless, unlovable, etc. And these thoughts and feelings is something that we never want others, especially our loved-ones, to ever experience.
I hope this helps those of you struggling in love to get a better understanding and definition of what love truly is. And don't give up!
#SharetheLove #GODISLOVE #loveonethebrain #love #alovelikethat #whatislove #babydonthurtme #donthurtme #nomore #ILOVEYOU
I love you ❤️